Have You Been Attacked By Email?Saturday, October 15, 2005Ever get that email that just made you feel 6 inches tall and embarrassed the heck out of you in front of 50 people that were copied? Was it your boss that sent it? What a loser. Email has become a popular way for weasels to hide behind their keyboard, launch an attack against you and feel a certain kind of sick satisfaction from it. Here is an a analogy. Would this email attacker do this in a meeting with 20 people in the room? Would he stand up and look at you, then proceed to spew out venom in front of the other 20 co-workers? Heck no. (Well at least not most of them) As a boss and an employee I have no time for emails that assault me or any employee. The older you get the less you are willing to tolerate such nonsense. If an employee attacks another employee and I am copied on it, they get a personal visit from me. If my boss sends one of these written torpedoes, s/he gets a visit. Who cares where it came from or who it is going to? It is a form of corporate terrorism. I have zero tolerance for it, period. So next time you see one coming at you or at your co-worker. Go find the culprit and confront them about it. Dealing with confrontation should always be in person. More on that in another post. Be good to yourself and don't be the victim of an email attack. posted at 10/15/2005 08:54:00 AM |
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Copyright © 2006 Beat Your Own Drum
13 Comments:
Eric:
Excellent advise.
Unfortunately, I have to admit that I am guilty of such an attack.
Many years ago I was managing an IT department. I was about to go on vacation, and on of my subordinates was, in my opinion, not foolowing guidelines, and doing only the jobs he wanted. So I dropped such a venom pustule via an email, and went on my merry way.
I stopped into the office shortly before departing the next day and was confronted by the president of the company. (Who happened, by the way, to be the older sister of the recipient of my email).
I was told in no uncertain terms to fix the situation, or I would not get to go on my vacation.
I got to go on my vacation, but I never had any respect from that subordinate. We later had to give him the "quit or be fired" management meeting.
It was most unfortunate, because at one point, we were very good friends.
Things you can do when you're victimized by a hostile work environment. I interview potential clients for a mid-sized law firm. Here are some suggestions. CAVEAT - depending on the professionalism of your employer, these suggestions could potentially resolve your problem, or worsen your situation:
1) prepare a chronology of events - things that have happened to you (who, what, where, when, etc.
2) Use your chronology to prepare a letter to your Human Resources Dept. Ask that they formally investigate the incidents in question and request a written response within 30 days. Perhaps you can attach your chronology. It should be nicely written with paragraphs (preferably typed).
3)If you are a union member, you should immediately advise your union and suggest they send the same letter on your behalf on union letterhead and take action on your behalf
4) If you believe you are being singled out and treated differently b/c of age, race, disability, gender, national origin, sexual orientation - it would be a good idea to contact your state's equivalent to the Department of Fair Employment and Housing so that they can investigate
I can't say I've ever been attacked via email, but I've defintely been sniped at. I sent an email to Hagatha the CQE one day (she wasn't answering her phone) letting her know that the shipping department was looking for her to do an inspection (her job). Her reply was, "So why don't you go do it?" (There are sooo many reasons why this would never happen, not the least of which I didn't know what the parts needed to be inspected for, but that's another story.) She then proceeded to tell me how she had been in a meeting and was very busy, etc. As if to say that her time was so much more valuable than mine. (She enjoys the feeling that she "outranks" others.) The tone of the email really ticked me off, but I decided not to stoop to her level and simply replied in a professional way that I wasn't aware she had been in a meeting and I had been very busy myself all morning. Then I saved a copy of the email for future reference when she does something like this one time too many.
i have never been humiliated by my boss through e-mail.
he usually humiliated people by talking directly to them
Ananke,
You are wise. Two major reasons.
#1 You did not let your emotions get the best of you and you did not lower your standards. A+++++++ YOU are in a small percentile of people that can actually do that.
I am totally serious. YOU are in the "way" minority!
I want to encourage you in keeping the HIGH the road.
#2 You wrote: "Then I saved a copy of the email for future reference when she does something like this one time too many."
YES! Keep a paper trail. Any good lawyer would tell you the same. YOU can crush big companies with excellent documentation. I have great examples of this for a future blog.
Peace....
Interest in renting a space? Or I would love to rent space from you?
Love your blog. -Eric
Blogging Boss
Eric Boehme
Anonymous,
YOU said "prepare a chronology of events - things that have happened to you (who, what, where, when, etc."
Yes, yes, yes and...
YES!
Never enough quality, time-sensitive, substantiated documentation.
Thanks for sharing. You are someone the Blogging Boss would like to see pop in here more often and share your wisdom.
eko,
Your boss is as much a loser as the one who hides behind the network.
Get your resume, update it and make a commitment to yourself right now that you are going to find a job where you have a chance.
Two Words of advice:
GET OUT!
Best,
Eric Boehme
The Blogging Boss
When are adults going to act like adults? HUMMM! I guess I just don't have that to worry about. I am VP and there are only three of us so I am one of the lucky ones. And sorry for anyone that has to go through that.
Nice blog here by the way. I like the topic and it could help a lot of poeople.
Shyloh,
You wrote "When are adults going to act like adults? HUMMM! I guess I just don't have that to worry about. I am VP and there are only three of us so I am one of the lucky ones. And sorry for anyone that has to go through that.
Nice blog here by the way. I like the topic and it could help a lot of people."
Adults are often chilren, stuck at one age or another. So your answer is simple: never.
If all the grown-ups actually acted grown up, I would not invest in this blog.
Eric Boehme
The Blogging Boss
Eric, that is true. Then you would have to do something else ha.
Maybe something like. "When will adults act like kids again?"
Oh my..
shyloh,
You are so right. Actually as I think about this, it is okay to have a "kid" in you. We should never lose that good part of being a kid. I am a father of four and I am most effective when I step out of being an adult and step back into being a kid with them. Play with them; be goofy, etc.
Now that I think about it, you have made a point here that I missed the first time I read it.
We all should be in touch with the kid in us and be able to enjoy that part. However, when we have never progressed any further than a certain age in emotional maturity, we are stuck. We stay a certain age and that is what causes the problems. Because we have more responsibility, we have become adults. If we cannot be an adult, then we cannot be responsible.
That is wat we see often in the workplace. People who got stuck and can't handle the responsibility of being an adult, let alone the responsibility of management.
Man I could go on...
Thanks for the comment, you have my wheels turning now for a new post.
-Eric
Eric, thanks! I've learned from bitter experience that it's best to stay calm in situations like that. Usually if you get emotional, you're just pegged as a troublemaker instead of having the problem taken seriously. I was once verbally attacked by a coworker (he later confessed that he'd had a "bad week;" like that was supposed to help). I got emotional, we got into a shouting match and yes, you guessed it, he didn't get so much as a slap on the wrist. He eventually got promoted to a supervisory position.
Renting space, is that like the "Rent My Blog" thing that's going on at Blog Explosion?
Wow. Amen. I have received and been copied in on many a hostile email. I just wanted to commend your post.
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