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Wednesday, April 04, 2007Ugly With a Capital "U"I'll be the first to admit that, back in my 20s and early 30s, I had no sense of style. None. I seriously cringe when I look at photographs of myself. Who is that shapeless, aesthetically void woman? is the question that pops to mind. I never really thought about it, you see. Oh, I thought about a few things, like favorite colors and such. But in retrospect I can say that I was dressing to please others. "Others" as in "My Mom." Not that this was done on any kind of conscious level. It's just that my mom has always dressed very conservatively and largely uninterestingly. She'd rather "blend in" than make a style statement. I love her dearly and wouldn't trade her for the world, but it took me almost forty years to realize that I don't want to "blend in," and that I do have a style statement to make; not to please others, but simply to express myself and Who I Am. Now, this is a lot easier to accomplish when one is in a decidedly un-pregnant state. And while it's true that maternity clothing in the last three or four years has done a remarkable turn-around, it's still relatively difficult to find cute, trendy maternity clothes without spending truckloads of money on obscure web sites and local specialty stores. Eric is going to confiscate my bank card if I'm not careful. Anyway, I went out on an Emergency Maternity Outfit Hunt yesterday afternoon. Why? Well, it's this dang directing-the-choir-on-Easter thing. I don't want to stand up in front of all those peoples and look like an off-kilter sack of potatoes. So I thought I'd hit a few stores that tout "maternity" as one of their departments. Oh. Goodness. Me. I don't think I've ever seen such ugly clothing in my life. Granted, my hopes were abnormally inflated due to my state of desperation. I unequivocally hate department stores and usually avoid them. But I knew that J. C. Penney and Sears were the most likely to have clothing-for-women-with-expanding-bellies, so off I went. And it's amazing that I didn't throw up right there in the store. We're talking UGLY. UGLY as in big-splotchy-prints-from-hell in gawd-awful color combinations. Shapeless shirts that looked as though they might double as gas grill covers. Bits of fabric labeled "sleeveless smock" that looked like leftover E.R. scrubs with the sleeves removed. I'm sorry. It's an affront to pregnant women everywhere. Maternity clothing should certainly be affordable, but to remove from it every vestige of beauty, of self-respect? It's appalling. My most delightful experience occurred at Macy's. Having spotted the word "maternity" on their store directory, I began to peruse the endless rows of women's clothing, but came up empty. Finally, I asked a sales clerk where I might fight the elusive maternity department. "Oh, we don't have maternity. I know it's on the sign..." I don't normally glare at sales clerks, but this gal got my most whithering rendition. "Yes, it is," I said. I hope she got the full effect of my dramatic sigh as I walked away. So I ended up buying a sweater top at Target, which had been my first stop. (You know that saying, "Stop while you're ahead?" It's been tormenting me since yesterday.) I don't love the top, but I don't hate it. And it goes well with my white prairie skirt. I am completely through with stressing over what to wear on Sunday. Naturally we are entering an unseasonable cold snap, and I will be freezing my lil' fanny off this weekend. After all that I went through to find the Perfect Spring Maternity Outfit, the weather fluke is par for the course. Anyway, I've just self-medicated by purchasing a darling Gap maternity halter top on Ebay. And I'd better look darn sexy in it, or Eric will confiscate my bank card, for sure. It ain't easy being pregnant. But I wouldn't trade it for the world. Labels: pregnancy |
About Me
I am: Mother to five stunningly individualistic children... Writer of young adult fantasy... Passionate advocate for Women At Home... Madly in love with my husband... In need of Organic Gourmet Chocolate on a regular basis. I've got a Paypal account if you'd like to contribute to the cause....
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9of my readers are feeling chatty:
((Jill)) I remember those days. I gave in and shopped at our local Motherhood Maternity. They have DARLING outfits! It is expensive though. You could always sell them on Ebay afterwards. Just a thought.
Or buy them on ebay! I got quite a few things that way!
Been to Old Navy yet? I got a few things there when I was pregnant with #2.
My commentor wants to comment, but my survival instinct is holding me back.
I bet you'd fit some of my clothes just fine. :-p
I'm glad all is well. As well as expected anyway!
Ken
I, too, have seen cute ones at Old Navy! And cheap too!
Susan and Drama Mama -- Old Navy is my FAVORITE FAVORITE maternity haunt! Most of my current maternity wardrobe comes from Old Navy. It's just that I needed something a bit "dressier" and Old Navy wasn't cutting it.
(((((((((((((Ken!!))))))))))))))
When I found myself unexpectedly pregnant (VERY unexpectedly), I had a huge dilemma on my hands… Do I ask my friend, who I just gave all of my maternity clothes to give them back? Or do I suck it up and go buy more? That was a tough one! (I ultimately asked her for half of them back)
I agree, shopping for maternity clothes is the worst!
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