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Thursday, October 26, 2006Don't Be Sad, JerryAnd please, please, PLEASE don't stand in awe. I agree with your (colorful) analogy. The public school system is a broken machine, despite scores of dedicated, diligent teachers out there. I liken it to a dance company. You may be the most brilliant dancer to yet join, but if all of the other dancers have broken legs, your skill won't go very far on the dance floor. Nothing can diminish your talent, but you will be handicapped by everyone around you. There will be no Swan Lake, no Sleeping Beauty. You will have to compromise your talent and lower your "dancing standards" to those of your colleagues. But Jerry, there is nothing innately special about me because I homeschool. I am not a particularly patient person (as my children will attest to); nor do I have any special skill as a "teacher." And your children would not receive any sort of "special educational blessing" by sitting next to my own children. In short, you and your wife are just as "skilled" as any parent needs to be in order to homeschool. For you see, it's not about systematically pouring information into their little heads. It's about facilitating their own, inborn ability to learn. And that begins with making sure they can read. Simply put, the most important "educational" thing I've ever done for my children is teaching them to read. A child who can read is a child who can learn. Anything. Before we moved to Tennessee, Eric and I had never heard of homeschooling. Once we learned about it (through meeting a family of fairly impressive children), the Lord laid it on our hearts to homeschool our own children. Mind you, we didn't even have children yet. It was one of those "this is what we are going to do" things -- and we barely knew a thing about it. Sometimes I'm frustrated. Sometimes I'm burned out. Sometimes I feel like a complete failure. In fact, I know that I couldn't do this if it weren't for the grace of God. My perfectionism, my anxiety, my divergence all work against me. Yet every day I watch my children following their passions, growing in their faith and in their knowledge of the world around them. I see Jonathan designing web sites and excelling at Physics; I see Maggie writing novels and learning to dance en pointe; I see Rachel blossoming as a photographer and learning to write stories; I see Spencer teaching himself math (yes, teaching himself) and reading his first chapter book (The Boxcar Children, of course). Best of all, I get to spend every day with them. Not each passing minute -- we'd drive each other beyond the brink of sanity. But I'm an active, vibrant part of their lives. They entrust their hearts to me instead of to a faceless peer group. They express to me their dreams, their desires, their hurts. I am honored and blessed beyond measure to be the mother of these four awesome children. In all my imperfection, they love my unconditionally. I am supremely thankful that I am able to homeschool them. I have met women who have longed to homeschool their children, only to have their husbands refuse to allow it. There are also women who want to homeschool but are forced to work outside the home to make ends meet. I do not take my blessing lightly. What it takes more than anything else to homeschool, Jerry, is the desire. Desire, followed by dedication. Not classes on "educational psychology," not a degree, not a teaching certificate. In fact, my "teacher training" did nothing but work against me when I first started homeschooling. I had to "de-program" myself before I started to become truly effective as my children's educational "coach." And I'm still learning. Thank you, my cyberfriend, for your words of affirmation. But do not be sad, and do not be awestruck. Instead, ask the Lord to show you what means He may have for an alternative education for your children. You may be joyously, wondrously, immeasurably surprised by what happens. And one more thing. From everything I've extracted from your writings, I sense that you are a loving, devoted dad. And that will remain true regardless of where your children are receiving their education. Remember that. Labels: homeschooling |
About Me
I am: Mother to five stunningly individualistic children... Writer of young adult fantasy... Passionate advocate for Women At Home... Madly in love with my husband... In need of Organic Gourmet Chocolate on a regular basis. I've got a Paypal account if you'd like to contribute to the cause....
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9of my readers are feeling chatty:
I'm not in awe necessarily, but boy howdy, I sure wouldn't want to take on home schooling with the Bear.
He has the attention span of a gnat. LOL
He will write one letter then has to have a drink. One more letter, another drink.
He also does happy dances in his seat after each letter.
I am more than happy to let his teachers do the hard part. I will help with the homework.
As for diagramming a sentence... Surely I must be too thirsty to do so.
Now I'm in awe... and all misty too :-)
Actually, we're in that economic situation known as Long Island, NY, that requires both Mrs.Write and I to have a job. In fact, I sort of have two.
Maybe things will change by the time BabyWrite is ready for school - either change in the public school system for the better, or in our economic position that allows for only 1 income stream.
I was taught at home.
In the area where I grew up the options open to parents who chose to homeschool were very very limited, and there was a terrible stigma attached to it. There weren't many outside classes. Social workers came to our house all the time. My mother could not take me shopping during the day because people constantly wanted to know why I wasn't in school, and once a clerk tried to call the cops. Some of my parents "friends" stopped speaking to them, and from those who did speak they had to deal with constant negative questions. "Aren't you afraid you're going to stunt her emotional growth?" "Why do you think you're smart enough to teach her?"
But for all of the problems, I loved it. Are there things I wish my parents had done differently? Of course. I wish they had been a little harder on me in some areas. I wish they had enrolled me in more outside classes. (Not that they had many to choose from.) But I know they did the best they could.
I have a good job. I can put together a sentence, not perfectly, but I try. I can add. I can talk to people. I have a good relationship with my husband and my friends. I have problems and issues, sure, but I don't blame that on homeschooling. Everybody, no matter how or where they went to school, has problems.
Well, this is a long comment, so I'll shut up now. I just wanted to share a little bit...I guess I shared a lot! :)
One of my biggest fears is that I may have to homeschool the bear at some point. The thought is terrifying, and depressing.
Dave -- He probably doesn't need to be learning those letters yet, which is why he is inclined to pop up from his seat and do lots of happy dances. Either that, or he's simply as wacky as his wonderful dad. :)
Jerry -- I hear ya. Believe it or not, one of our main weather anchors on one of the Nashville news channels homeschools her children. She does the evening weather reports (up through the late news) and homeschools her kids during the day. THAT kind of thing makes me stand in awe.
Mrsatroxi -- WOW! Your parents were among the many pioneers who worked hard and fought long to make homeschooling legal in all 50 states. It was very difficult for these early homeschooling parents to do what they so desperately wanted to do. My hat's off to your parents. Homeschoolers today (myself included) don't realize how GOOD they have it, thanks to these early families who were willing to take on the role of pariah in order to educate their own children.
Erica -- Why?
From what I've read in the past about your children, they've also learned a few things you didn't mention. Things such as compassion, empathy, respect, appreciation and a slew of other things you've mentioned or that I've gleened from your posts. Reading posts like this one make it easy to know where they get that from.. Their teacher.
(((((((((((((((Ken))))))))))))))))
As Jill's husband, let me add to her very humble post. Jill has been passionate about homeschooling since the first day we learned about it. She has researched, attended conferences, and sought the wisdom from those who homeshooled before us.
Despite all the passion and dedication, Jill is not more inherently a homeschool mom than anyone else I know. I hear "I hate homeschooling" from time to time, born out of normal frustration. Kids are not perfect students in or out of a classroom.
She struggles to keep it all together at times, but she is doing something she believes in and with the Lord's help she marches on.
As much as I love and admire her, the only thing I see that qualifies her to teach at home is dedication and perseverance.
I love you sweetie. -Eric
And I don't wear a denim jumper.
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